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I’ve talked before about the sex
and how some questions make me vexed.
Yet still some can’t keep their mouth’s shut
and question me about my butt.
It’s when they ask about the smell
I feel resentment in me swell.
My favourite way to deal with it
is pointing out “It’s not just shit!”
“I think the worst smell that I know
comes from other folk’s B.O.”
I follow up with ‘What the hell!
it’s only just another smell’.
I’ll tell them ‘Ostomies are clean
much more so than my bum has been’.
Then with a great impertinence
I’ll talk about incontinence.
Once this conversation starts
I will comment on ‘their’ farts
and I will use that age-
that their shit stinks, just like mine.
There is a difference with us
because we do not make a fuss.
It’s all contained within a bag
and filters mean the smell won’t lag.
I carry round deodorant spray
so any smells are kept at bay.
Unlike many other folk
who stink, but think that it’s a joke.
I do not get into a state
I just give it to them straight.
There’s nothing smelly about me
certainly not my ostomy.
Reproduced by kind permission of Bill Withers.
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